So currently I'm single but have a thing for a certain someone. I knew I was a strong woman to begin with but I also knew sometimes I let things from my past creep back in and affect my present situations. For example, I talked with someone 4 over 4 yrs and never got the title. He messed me up emotionally and mentally really bad when it comes to trusting men and letting my guard down. So i found out today, Im letting those negative past issues come back up with this new man. I dont see myself as this scared person when it comes to men but somethings i said today showed me that I need to forget and accept those issues. I never compare anyone to the one next to them, but I realized Im still letting my past affect me and I shouldnt, its not fair to anyone and definitely doesnt show this new man who I'am or how I feel. So to this man:
I'm sorry, I view you on a whole different level and our potential is amazing. I only ask for you to realize I'am working through my past pains and don't stray from me while I do so, I appreciate you and "Dig" you, you know this :) I tend to express myself at an extreme level and I'm sorry if you take it in anyway other than how I mean it. My past is crazy, I've been hurt so much so being treated well is very new for me, I'm trying handsome, MW I care alot, dont forget that :)
My lesson for myself today, let go of all past experiences that will hinder you from gaining something amazing. Im slowly starting to learn that it's okay to take my wall down and especially with "MW",I ned to be able to start fresh and let the past go. Im a major hard ass at times, and "getting sum1 b4 they get me" has always been my defense mechanism, obviously it's wrong lol so I'm trying to fix that completely.So like Madea, Getting them b4 I get Got is what I'm used to lol but I see something now that is so new and something I want so bad, I'm willing to do anything I can...just my thoughts today :)
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